This has been going through my head all semester. Actually it is even the desktop on my computer.
I have been in a lot of pain this semester. Growing Pains. Physical Pains. Spiritual Pains. Emotional Pains. Pain. It is a season of it.
If you have read my previous posts, you know that this has been a hard year for me. A lot of pains and a lot of change. I now live most of the months of the year in Springfield, MO.
This semester I have fought giants. I had 8 classes, some of which I never thought I would pass. I was far away from so many special people in my life. I missed out on the wedding planning for my older brother's wedding that is in a week. My dog had to stay with my parents. I had to do so many new and uncomfortable things. I had to trust God as it felt like at times He was purposely hurting me. I had no choice. I had to keep fighting.
But that promise in scripture kept in my heart as did so many others. (2 Corinthians 12:9 too)
And you know what?
I survived. I made new friends that I know will be there for life. I learned that I can work hard and that I can leave the rest to God because He wasn't trying to punish me. I learned that I can lean on Him for anything. I learned He is good... at all times.
The hits keep on coming. But the blessings do too! God is so good.
I found out today that not only did I pass the classes that I fought with all semester, I got A's and B's in them. That may seem small to some, but to those that saw how hard I had to work and all the hours with the tutors I spent and how many hours I practiced and those that prayed for me daily, it is a miracle. And as my mother who listened to my tears during hard class days....God answered prayers. God is good. All the time.
God broke me. He has successfully taken away all security blankets in my life. He has ripped anything I was holding onto out of my hands. A non-crying girl now has officially started crying. (I seriously don't even cry in movies and started crying hearing piano the other day during finals)
I am so thankful He has.
I don't want God's second best. I want to change the world for Him. I want to sing His praises and help find His lost sheep. I want to speak into others lives. I want to be a role model for my future children.(a loooonnnnggg time from now). I want to be the best I can be for God. I want to hear "Well done my good and faithful servant." I want to be the best Alexis Grace Salensky I can be.
So He broke me. And I know He will again and again. I know I will fight Him again on it, but He will always win. I just love Him so much, but He loves me more and wants more for me. He wants to give me the desires of my heart, and He knows how to get me there when I don't.
Because of this year I now know who I am in Christ and what God is capable of. That is the best gift I could ever receive other than His Son.
How beautiful is it to have a Heavenly Father who loves us too much to leave us how we are?
Love and Blessings,
Lexie
Oh yeah my favorite things for today(some of them):
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